Boy Oh Boyers

We usually finish up the last daytime feeding about 8:30pm. I am quite happy to go to bed at that time (or earlier!), but Rowan seems to have always a little bit of awake time stored up just for this early nighttime hour. He doesn't need to be held or rocked -- he just wants to be someplace where something is going on so he can look around. The last two nights, it's been Tom who has provided the evening entertainment, but with tomorrow being Monday it is I who will postpone my blissful slumber. Rowan's as content to watch me type as he is to watch anything else, so I will squeeze in this post today after all, when I had thought it was a lost cause.

This morning the three of us went to church. Whether to go was a question, since my motherly paranoia thinks of all the germs on all the people and cringes at the thought of taking such a tiny one into the midst! Of course these overprotective tendencies will be overcome or fade away, and I'm glad we didn't let them stop us from going today. Rowan didn't mind the music. The only small challenge was when it came time for a feeding, Rowan was so interested in the other babies in the nursery, it was tough to keep his mind on the meal he had moments before insisted upon quite strongly! But again we succeeded.

Today was Rowan's due date. I can't find words to express how glad I am that he came early. The love that I knew I'd feel is different than I thought it would be. I knew it'd be strong. I knew it'd be new. But I wasn't prepared for this: his arm, his leg, his hand -- each beautiful, soft part individually -- evokes in me feelings probably stronger than any I'd ever felt before. These are feelings of awe. Of joy. Responsibility. And wonder.